a sanctuary in a lion's mouth
by withneedleandthread
Summary: 'in architecture, our lines will measure a map to find us. blue ink will guide us home.' hanna/lucas, au


i.

Lucas is pretty sure that the worst part about being the nerd with the huge crush on Hanna Marin, one of the most popular girls at school, is the fact that his life sounds like the plot to a stupid cheesy tween movie.

(Oh and also the fact that he's pretty sure she thinks his name actually _is _Hermy, thanks to the nickname he was saddled with after one of her friends started a rumor that he was born a hermaphrodite. Because he spilled coffee on her shoes.)

He doesn't dwell on it, though, because he has important stuff to do, like the unassigned odd problems from yesterday's homework, and his boring job at the grocery store, and those comic books that he collects. Heck, for a nerd with a hopeless crush, he's actually pretty good about not thinking about it too much.

Okay, that's a lie. If he was really that great at ignoring his crush on her, he wouldn't keep thinking about asking her about that look of stress and worry she gets when she's lost in thought or not paying attention in class. It could just be about that break up with her boyfriend, but no - it's more than that.

He knows he shouldn't be surprised by the popular girl in school having deeper issues that no one really notices - after all, everyone has issues they need to work through - but he always gets a sense of immediacy to the worry, that the problem or thing that's worrying her is hanging over her head, and is a problem which could easily spiral out of control.

Then he shakes his head and gets back to work restocking the milk, because the last thing he needs is his boss to decide that 'taking a chance' on hiring a teenager was a bad idea.

ii.

Hanna's life hasn't been very easy, and her friends don't know the half of it. She just doesn't know how they would respond if she told them that ever since her parent's divorce, they've been struggling financially - on the brink of losing their house, even. Sometimes she likes to pretend that it's not happening, that life's okay (and the fact that her mom tries to protect her from all of the stuff going on makes that easier) but there's always this underlying stress and worry that never goes away.

Sometimes she thinks maybe she should tell her friends about it, but there's a fear that holds her back, and a feeling that if she tells them, it will be real. Besides, her mom and her have a sort of unspoken agreement that no one needs to know about their financial issues, because they can take care of themselves.

This agreement is always there, on the edge of their conversations, and in the awkward conversations where they half talk about it, and which mostly consist of her mom reassuring her that everything's going to be okay.

She never really fully believes it until one day her mom explains that she's going on a business trip to New York. She's always been passed up on those, and the fact that her boss is finally sending her on one is kind of a big deal. When her mom tells her that everything's going to be okay, she actually sounds like she believes what she's saying, and Hanna means it when she assures her that she believes her, giving her a hug before her mom leaves.

iii.

It's a perfectly normal day at work, until suddenly something like an earthquake hits, and Lucas has to jump away quickly to keep from getting hit by the boxes on the shelf he was restocking. At the same time, all the lights go out. After everything settles, he follows everyone outside, trying to get something of an idea of what happened. He's not as panicked, though, because he's pretty sure it was just an earthquake that took out some power lines, that's all.

Then he sees the mushroom cloud in the distance, the panic everyone else is feeling hits him, too - he immediately thinks of his parents, who were both taking some time off of work, and, realizing he left his cell phone at home, he starts running.

After a frantic search, he finds it under his bed, and is about to call his dad when he sees he has a missed call, and there's no service.

The call is from his mom.

_"Hey, honey, just calling to let you know that we're coming home a few days earlier than we expected, you see -"_

His mom is interrupted by the slightly muffled sound of his dad saying 'what the hell' (his dad never swears, this is a big deal), and she starts to ask what's wrong, only to scream. Then, she starts to say something else, directed towards Lucas with fear and panic making her nearly incomprehensible, only to be cut off by the sound of shattered glass and more screaming and then the message just _ends_.

Lucas drops his cell phone as his hands start shaking, and he knows he needs to tell someone, that people need to know what he just heard, but instead he stands frozen in the same spot for some amount of time, paralyzed from shock and horror and denial and _oh god my parents are probably dead _and the next thing he knows he's curled up on the floor of his room sobbing his eyes out.

iv.

She's about to go meet up with Mona to hang out when what she at first assumes is an earthquake hits. She's already scared enough, but then she sees the cloud-thing she can never remember the name of, and even though she never really paid attention in science class, she knows that that's not a good sign.

Her thoughts go to her mother immediately, and she tries to call her, but she quickly realizes that she has no service.

Then a car parks and Mona runs out, pulling her into a tight hug asking if she's okay, if she's gotten in contact with her mom, if she knows what's going on, and she comforts Hanna when she finds out that she has none of the answers, either.

"Remember what we did during that snow storm a few years ago?" Her friend suddenly asks.

"Yeah - we had a sleepover, why?"

"I think you could use one right now."

Maybe there are better ways to respond to what happened, more serious things they could do, but all Hanna knows is that she doesn't want to be alone.

v.

Somehow Lucas managed to pull himself together enough to show the police the message his parents left him. No one knows for sure what's happened, but they're pretty sure that it was a terrorist attack. Half the time he has this hopeless numb feeling, and the other half of the time he's realizing again that his parents are probably dead. Needless to say, he prefers feeling numb.

He hasn't told anyone besides the police about his parents. He tried to tell his boss, but he couldn't get the words out.

Hanna stops by the store to buy stuff for a sleepover she and Mona are having with some friends, and she talks him into agreeing to bring over the food and drinks for them. It doesn't take much convincing, really. Before, he would've planned to use the opportunity to get to know her better, but that stuff doesn't really matter so much anymore, so he plans to just drop off the food and go home and lie in his bed until he falls asleep.

When he gets there, he surprised to see that the lights are on, until he remembers that she has a generator, which must be why about half of the school is there.

As he puts the bags of food and soda and stuff on the kitchen table, a few girls make sarcastic comments, which barely registers, and which he really couldn't care less about. In fact, he's about to leave when suddenly Officer Garrett Reynolds walks in and shuts down the party, explaining that with the crisis at hand, all generators are being collected. Some people protest, but the fact that he's a police officer convinces them out of it, and everyone leaves after the generator is gone.

vi.

"I'll help you clean up."

The offer comes as such a surprise to Hanna that for a moment she doesn't know what to say, which goes on for a bit longer as she tries to remember his name.

"Thanks - uh, Herman."

He sighs, "It's Lucas."

"Oh."

After an awkward moment of silence, he starts cleaning, and so does she. They barely say anything to each other - in fact, the only thing said is when he offers a place for the perishable stuff in her fridge and which she bought for the party in the grocery store that he works at, briefly explaining that they were allowed to keep their generator.

"You can drop them off whenever."

"Thanks."

After a while, they finish cleaning, and she walks with him to the door for one reason or another. He's only taken, like, five steps away from her house, when it suddenly starts to rain, and - wait, didn't they say something about rain being poisonous and bad at that town meeting?

"Lucas, wait!" She yells as she runs after him, grabbing his arm and pulling him back into her house, shutting the door.

"What?" He asks, obviously confused.

"You can't go outside - it's raining."

"It's just rain."

"No, remember at the town meeting they had - they talked about how the rain could be poisonous or something because we don't know what type of bombs were used."

Lucas stares at her, "I - I didn't go." He pauses, before adding, "Thanks."

"No problem." Hanna replies, hesitating for a moment before offering, "You know, you can stay here, for now. Like, you can crash on my couch."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

They sit in the living room in awkward silence for a long time, though it's worse than the silence when they were cleaning, because they at least had the cleaning to distract them from the fact that they weren't talking. Hanna wishes that she could think of something to say, but she's never really talked with Lucas before, so she has no clue what would actually start a conversation.

So, when he asks something, she feels relieved.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." She automatically replies, only to stop, "I mean - no." She bites her lip, "I'm worried about my mom. She was on a business trip in New York, and I haven't heard from her. I. . .what if she's hurt, or. . ." Hanna can't bring herself to finish the sentence, "Um. How are your parents - have you heard from them?"

He's quiet for a very long time, and just when she's about to say something, he finally talks.

"I think they're dead."

Hanna gasps, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry! How - how'd you find out?"

He tells her the whole story, about the missed phone call, and the abrupt ending of the message. At some point, they both start crying, and at another point she takes his hand and holds it. After he finishes explaining, she can only choke out another 'I'm so sorry'.

For a while, they just sit in silence, holding hands and listening to the rain falling.

vii.

Lucas stays over at Hanna's house. They sleep on the couches in her living room, and even though they never say it out loud, they both know it's because neither one of them wants to be alone. Some nights they fall asleep holding hands. They actually don't talk very much, but it's not weird.

He's pretty sure that this whole staying at her house thing wasn't supposed to last so long, but he's not questioning it. He doesn't want to go back to his empty house. (Besides, even though he's not that great with girls. . .at all, he's pretty sure that Hanna likes not being alone in her house.)

Life is different these days, obviously. They're still in the dark about who fired the missiles, but from what they've pieced together they're pretty sure that it was some sort of terrorist attack on all of the major cities in America. This isn't all that encouraging, and there's an anxiety that hangs over everyone as they wait for further information.

viii.

It's funny how much things have changed, how little all of the stuff that seemed so important matters now.

Plus how much Lucas has grown to matter to Hanna. He pretty much lives at her house now, and even though they don't actually talk all that much, she's glad to have him around. She's not sure what she would if she had to go to sleep every night in her empty, quiet house. While the couch isn't nearly as comfortable as her bed, she's so glad that he hasn't said anything about sleeping somewhere else. It's comforting for him to be nearby, and she doesn't worry so much about her mother.

She's pretty sure that if things were normal, Mona would've made a big deal about it, but things are different. Her friend leaves it alone, and she's extremely grateful for that.

ix.

Somehow, a routine develops. Lucas works at the grocery store and spends time with Hanna. As time goes by, they talk more. They move the couches so they're next to each other, and one night when they're both too tired to move, they end up just sharing one. Nothing happens, but that's okay. One night when she fast asleep he screws up the courage to kiss her on the forehead. The pattern makes life easier.

Then the routine gets thrown out. For the first time in weeks, a tv picks up a signal - from Japan. Despite the fact that no one speaks Japanese, they manage to piece together that their assumption was correct: a group of terrorists bombed most of America's major cities - New York, Boston, Los Angeles - all those cities are gone.

If that isn't hard enough to swallow, then his boss is found dead in the store one morning. He was knifed to death by some desperate idiot. Lucas tries not to think about the fact another person he's close to is dead. It hurts too much.

The thing is, he left Lucas the store, and since his parents are. . .well. . .he's in charge, basically.

Hanna sits with him in the middle of the store for an hour after he finds out.

"I can't do this." He finally chokes out, "I can't run a _store_."

"Sure you can. You're the smart one after all." She whispers, with bittersweet humor, then adds in a more serious tone, "I'm sure you can do it, Lucas. I believe in you."

It doesn't make the situation better; Lucas is still a teenager with very little work experience suddenly thrust in charge of a business. But it makes him feel better.

x.

Okay, so she has even less work experience than Lucas, isn't very good at math, and really sucks at mopping floors, but Hanna helps where she can, and it's the thought that counts, right?

One night they're working late at the store, and after finishing cleaning up and stuff, they curl up in the rolling chair in the office. It's not the most comfortable place to sit, really, but they're both so tired that they don't care.

They're talking about random stuff, nothing particularly important. She turns to say something, only for her to bump noses with him because they're sitting so close. She starts laughing, and soon Lucas is, too, but when the laughter dies down, she's suddenly hit by how close they are, and the next step seems so obvious, she doesn't know how she didn't see it before.

Hanna leans in, and kisses Lucas on the lips. He's too shocked to react, but then he kisses her back. She rests her forehead on his as he wraps his arms around her, and they both sit in the office of the grocery store for a long time.

Life isn't easy, and despite what he says, she's pretty sure it's only going to get worse, but for now she has him. She's not alone, and she has hope.

They might just be okay.

* * *

><p>This story was inspired by Skylar and Dale from the show Jericho. I was thinking about how they're kind of like Lucas and Hanna in a dystopian story who actually end up together, and then I <em>had<em> to write this.

The title and the lyrics in the description are from the song _Careful Hands_ by Sleeping at Last.


End file.
